Yay! It’s Freebee Fridays time!
First of all, Congrats to last week’s winner:
You’ve received a free copy of “A Heart Broken” by Sara Barnard.
If you’d like to find out more about Sara Barnard and her books, hop on over to www.sarabarnardbooks.com
Yee Haw! I had fun last week.
Hey, where have you been?
Texas! I was out with Sara Barnard explod’, stuff.
Oh, umm, that’s nice.
I’m glad you made a friend.
So what’s on tap for this week?
Kerri Neal is waiting outside.
Are you ready?
What kind of host are you, making her wait?
One who likes to make sure her Little Blue Lady is in a good mood first before subjecting visitors to her.
Hmmm. Well, okay.
Ms. Neal? So nice to meet you. I am the Little Blue Lay From Mars.
How are you today?
Oh, ah, good.
Is this where I talk about my book Torn?
Yes oh yes! I love to talk about books, but only if they are worth reading. So let’s cut to it. Why would someone want to read a torn book? Isn’t that a little hard?
Oh, not… the book isn’t torn.
The title is Torn.
Well, if the title is torn, how will anyone know what it’s called?
No, it’s umm…
You know what, ladies… next question. Let’s just leave it at that, okay? What makes your novel great, Kerri?
It’s fun, it’s sexy, it’s a nail biter.
What more could you want?
Sexy? Is it human sexy or Martian sexy? I really don’t get into all the half-headed men on this planet.
I think everyone is Kerr’s book has whole heads.
Are you sure?
Go ahead, move on.
Well, if there are no sexy Martians, why would anyone want to read it?
Did I mention it’s fun, sexy and a nail biter?
Well, ok then. It’s also a love story. And there is some violence for you adrenaline junkies.
What kind of violence?
Does anything explode?
Why, yes. Yes something does explode.
Your heart! There’s also an actual explosion, but I don’t want to give anything away.
Jennifer, she’s talking about exploding hearts. Is this a horror book, because that sounds really messy.
I don’t think that’s what she meant.
Are you sure?
Keep going see what she says.
Okay, so, what exactly is it about?
After Agent Shane Baxter’s last mission failed both professionally and personally, he fled the States and changed his name. When Dixie Peterson re-enters his life, he has a second chance to make things right. Dixie is determined to find out the truth about Shane’s departure from her life two years ago, but someone else from her past is seeking revenge. Shane and Dixie are forced to confront the past, while their future is still unclear.
That doesn’t sound like anything explodes. Hey, is this a squishy Romance novel?
It’s a nail-biter!
She doesn’t sound very convincing. I have a bad feeling about this one. How do I know she can be trusted?
Ask her some trust-worthy questions.
Okay, Ms Neal: Would you like to take over the world?
Um…YES! Disney World!
Cuz I’ve never been there and it sounds awesome!
Is that too many exclamation points?
Disney world? What the heck are you supposed to do with Mickey Mouse and a bunch of dancing animals?
But I like dancing animals.
Erghhhh. Are you making fun of me? I don’t like it when people make fun of me. Last chance, Neal: If you could explode just one thing, what would it be?
Ok, what’s your fascination with exploding?
I wish I could blow up a watermelon.
Seriously, I only blown up things in my head.
Ugh! She’s done. Exploding watermelons and dancing fruit. I have nothing in common with this woman! Where’s my ray gun! Once I get rid of her, let’s go out and get something to eat.
Wait! Ummmm… Kerri, quick, she’s hungry describe your favorite dessert.
See if you can distract her!
Well, I love white chocolate lemon cheesecake. Let that soak into your brain for a minute. The buttery white chocolate, the tangy lemon, the melt-in-your-mouth creamy cheese. Then when it’s all gone you have those little ooey-gooey graham cracker crumbs that stick to the plate and the fork. That’ll satisfy your sweet tooth.
What is it with you authors and lemons! Disgusting! Prepare for your demise!
Wait! Stop… just blow up her book… don’t blow up her! Quick, Kerri, do you have a bribe?
How about a hand-crochet cover for her e-reader?
I’ll make it myself!
A pretty blue to match her hair!
You’d make me something?
Sure. You look like a nice little blue alien… when you’re not painting that ray gun at me, that is.
You can even use it as a comfy bed.
It would fit you perfectly.
[Powers down ray-gun] Okay.
I’ll pretend you didn’t say anything about lemons.
Awesomesauce! And how about we give away a handmade crochet eReader cover to a guest today with a copy of your ebook of Torn?
They can even pick the color.
As long as it’s not gray. I don’t do gray.
There you have it! Comment below for a free copy of Torn by Kerri Neal, and a bonus custom handmade crochet eReader cover. How about them apples?
Thanks for coming Kerri!
The Little Blue Lady From Mars © Jennifer M. Eaton.
- Myths about crochet (bretonyarnerie.wordpress.com)