Oh Yeah!

It’s the Sunday Snippets

Critique Blog Hop!

In this hop, participants post 250 words of their work in progress to be critiqued. Then everyone hops around to critique others. Don’t have a post of your own? We’d love a critique anyway! And next time you can sign up yourself (see below)

All right. Call me crazy… but I don’t have anything else to post… So I am posting the first 250 words of my new novel which is the sequel to LAST WINTER RED from the Make Believe Anthology.

I just wrote this about three hours ago, and it has not been proofed.

Yeah. I’m nuts.

What I’m looking for is world-building. Can you feel the world? There is no scenery yet. What would you like to see in this scene to help you visualize?

This is a sequel. For those of you who have read LAST WINTER RED: Does this draw you right back into that world?

“It’s not every day a man gets to meet his wife. You should be excited.”

Henry smoothed the red cuffs accenting his tapered black shirt. “I am, Mother. But this is the most important day of my life. I’m a little nervous.”

“Pish. Today you are just getting married. Nine months from now, when you validate yourself with your first child—that will be the most important day of your life.” She brushed non-existent lint from his shoulders.

“Of course mother.” Henry held perfect, stiff posture as his mother moved around him, her long red skirt shifting at her ankles as she straightened every seam.

“There.” She stepped back, smiling. “As perfect as any young Red could be—and so handsome.”

“I’m sure I’m no more handsome than any other, mother.”

She shook her head. “Nonsense. You are ten times the Red of any of your siblings. You’ll be wed highly. I guarantee it.”

She picked up a pitcher from the table and poured two glasses of water.

“Were you frightened, Mother, on your wedding day?”

“Frightened? No, of course not. Excited was more the word. This is the day all Reds are born for—to finally have the opportunity to join society, to add your distinction to the world. Your father and I validated ourselves on our wedding day, you know.”

Henry bit back his laugh. “Yes, Ma’am, you’ve told us all many times.”

She handed him a glass. “None of your siblings have granted our family the prestige of a wedding day conception. I look forward to good news tomorrow morning.”

“I will do my best, Mother.” He bowed his head.