Category Archives: Author Interview

Am I a Real Person? I’m not sure.

Hmm, am I a real person?

Hmmm.__Wait_a_minute_00000

*Please wait while I hum the Jeopardy theme song in my head for 30 seconds while flying around the room on my unicorn*

Project1

The answer is . . . no.

I am a robot: eat, sleep, write, eat, sleep, write, eat, sleep, write.

Okay, SERIOUS MODE: On.

Hello, I’m Jamie Ayres, and the truth is, I wish I were a robot. I’m more real than I care to admit. If real means being a frustrated, insecure, hot mess. Yeah, the past month has been crazy.

If I was a robot, I could accept or refuse thoughts from bullies without getting upset. I could wire my brain and abilities any way I wanted. I could program myself to be happy no matter whom or what surrounded me each day.

But that’s not the mark of a real person. And as my second novel, 18 Truths, was being released and attacks were coming from all sides, I recognized God was showing me my own personal truth in the midst of it. He allows bad days to happen to make us aware of how much we need help.

My definition of a real person is one who tells the truth, means what they say but doesn’t say it mean, and has a good heart. From that perspective, I rather like the label of being a “real” person, even as I listen to the voices of my characters whispering in the dark corners of my mind.

Alien PKO_0003410That doesn’t mean I’m not opposed to the Little Blue Lady abducting me

*puts on foil hat and chants, “Take me to your leader.”

Together, we will rule the Earth!!! 

Be careful what

you wish for!

Want to know more about Jamie Ayres? Hop on over to her website (Quick, before the Little Blue Lady does)

Check out Jamie’s book HERE. The paperback is on sale. Wahoo!

You can also feed your ereader, cause they need a little love, too.

(Tissues sold separately)

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What’s the Funniest Thing You’ve Found When You’ve Editied Your Manuscript?

Manuscript bloopers. Aren’t they a gas?  I sometimes look forward to that first read-through after I’ve finished a novel, just to see the funny things I accidentally typed.

What’s even better is when I completely read over them and send the novel out to beta. Boy do my beta-partners get a blast out of that!

Here’s J.K. Ford to talk about some of her bloopers.

If you write at all, you’ve had your share of manuscript bloopers, whether it’s a novel, term paper, short story or newspaper article.  Manuscript bloopers come in the form of misspelled words, incorrect words in wrong places, nouns doing odd things they can’t do, misplacement of words and dangling participles.  Here are five examples of manuscript bloopers from my own writings. Go ahead.  Laugh.  I did.  After I bonked myself on the head.

Marci laughed as Jason hip-bumped around the room, signing an old Aerosmith tune.

(Really?  He signed a tune?  Interesting.)

 

David shuffled to the bathroom and let out a long yarn.

(The imagery here is too comical for me.  Poor David.)

Standing at the window, Eric’s hands rested on the sill.

(Don’t you hate it when hands can’t decide to stand or rest?)

Lily laid back and sighed as her eyes following her father around the room.

(I’d do a bit more than sigh if my eyes were out of their sockets and following someone)

“Where is that blasted hat at?”

(I NEVER place participles at the end of a sentence.  Ever.  It’s like a huge pet peeve for me, and yet I found one!!  Agghhh.  To tell you the truth, I think my son snuck in and added it when I wasn’t looking just to make me cringe and turn 10 shades of red.  And yes, he would do that.)

Give you E-Reader a Christmas present. J.K. Ford’s One More Day Anthology is now on sale for just $3.99!  Click here to BUY IT NOW!

What are some of your manuscript bloopers?

About J.K. Ford:

As a young Army brat, Reader’s Choice award winner J. (Jenny) Keller Ford, traveled the world and wandered the halls of some of Germany’s most extraordinary castles hoping to find the dragons, knights and magic that haunted her imagination. Though she never found them, she continues to keep their legends alive.  Her story, The Amulet of Ormisez, is available as part of the MAKE BELIEVE anthology. Dragon Flight, is part of the One More Day anthology.  When not at her keyboard breathing new life into fantasy worlds, Jenny spends time collecting seashells, bowling, swimming, riding roller coasters and reading.  She works as a paralegal by day and lives on the west coast of Florida with her family, three dogs, and a pretentious orange cat who must have been a dragon in his previous life.

The Little Blue Lady Makes Chocolate Mousse

Ding Dong

Alien Huh OpenHello?

Who Are you?

Hi!

I’m Darlene Fredette.

I’m here to cook.

.

Alien Huh OpenCook? I don’t cook.

I’m an alien. Oh, and I interview people.

Yeah, but interviews are so Fourth of July.  Christmas is coming.

Nobody wants to read an interview while you’re rushing about with Christmas shopping, wrapping gifts, and baking those delicious treats.

Instead of boring people with all that, I’m here to share a recipe that my heroine, Candy Cane, makes in my book “One Sweet Christmas”.

.

Alien EweI’m not sure if I can do that.

I might get in trouble.

You see Jennifer…

Awe, don’t be such a blue Scrooge.

Let’s get cooking.

We’re going to make

Chocolate Mousse

Alien nervousOh, that sounds yummy.

But last time I cooked I made a bit of a mess.

.

No worries!

It’s easy.

Here’s what we will need:

Ingredients:

4 ounces (120 grams) bittersweet or semisweet chocolate, cut into small pieces

2 tablespoons (28 grams) unsalted butter, cut in small pieces

2 tablespoons strong coffee or espresso (optional)

2 large eggs, separated

1/8 teaspoon cream of tartar

4 tablespoons (60 grams) granulated white sugar, divided

1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1/2 cup (120 ml) heavy whipping cream (35-40% butterfat content)

.

Got all that?

.

.

Alien nervous.

Umm, I think so.

.

Great!  This is all we have to do…

Directions:

In a medium-sized stainless steel bowl set over a saucepan of simmering water, melt the chocolate, butter, and coffee. Remove from heat and set aside to cool for a few minutes. Then whisk in the two egg yolks. Cover and refrigerate while you whip the egg whites and whipping cream.

In the bowl of your electric mixer (or with a hand mixer), whip the two egg whites with the cream of tartar until foamy. Gradually add two tablespoons of sugar and continue to beat until stiff peaks form, yet the whites are still glossy and not dry. Set aside.

In another bowl, whip the heavy cream, remaining two tablespoons sugar and vanilla extract until soft peaks form.

Alien SmileI love this part. It reminds me of the fluffy mountains on Mars. 

Hey, do you want to talk about your book while you are here? 

What’s is about?

It’s going to take more than a few pieces of chocolate to fill this
Scrooge’s heart with Christmas cheer. Luckily Candice Cane has a whole shop full…

Candice Cane is not proud of the way she acted
after her last encounter with Jackson Frost. Sure revenge was fun, but it’s
left Jackson standing, angry and looking for answers, on the welcome mat in her
chocolate shop. Now he’s after some revenge of his own.

Jackson returned to his small hometown for one
reason and one reason only…so he’s not sure how he’s ended up in a Santa suit in the middle of a chocolate shop, at the behest of its beautiful owner,
instead of high-tailing it back to the city as fast as he can.

Alien SmileSounds like fun.

So, she’s made this recipe?

She sure has.  Hey, can you get that chocolate mixture out of the refrigerator for me?  Thanks.  Now gently stir a couple of spoonfuls of the beaten egg whites into the chocolate mixture to lighten it, and then fold the remaining whites into the chocolate mixture, gently but thoroughly. Fold in the whipped cream.

Spoon the chocolate mousse into six individual serving dishes or glasses. Cover and refrigerate for a couple of hours. Serve with additional whipped cream, fresh raspberries and/or shaved chocolate. Makes 6 servings.

Alien SmileOh!

This is delicious!

.

.

See, I told you.

And very little mess.

Alien nervousIt was pretty easy.

But do you think we should be worried about the chocolate that sprayed on the ceiling?

Nah.

She’ll never notice.

Have a blue Christmas!

.

Alien PKO_0003410

You too!

About Darlene Fredette : An avid reader since childhood, Darlene loved to put a pencil to paper and plot out stories of her own. Her writing is a combination of contemporary romance with chick lit flare, and a main focus as a plot-driven page-turner. When Darlene isn’t writing, editing, or reading she enjoys spending time with her husband, daughter, and Yellow Lab.

Where to buy One Sweet Christmas: http://www.escapepublishing.com.au/product/9780857991058#

Stalk Darlene here:

Web Blog: http://findingthewritewords.blogspot.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DarleneLF

Twitter: https://twitter.com/DarleneLF

The Little Blue Lady Meets Her First Man

Free_Fridays!

PKO_Alien 3 0003387[The Little Blue Lady peeks out the front door.] 

What is that?

Jennifer13What do you mean what is that?

It’s an author.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Doesn’t look like any author I’ve seen before.

.

Jennifer13Oh, Umm, that’s because he’s a guy.

You’ve never interviewed a guy before, have you?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387No.

Your males are not blue either? This is a very odd planet.

Jennifer13Yeah, well, you could always go back home, you know. 

I mean, I’d miss you, but no one’s keeping you here.

[wink]

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Maybe someday.

After I take over your world.

.

Jennifer13Yeah, saw that one coming. 

In the meantime, why don’t you play nice with the author guy.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387[She opens the door] No worries. 

I haven’t disintegrated an author in at least a few months.

Jennifer13Yeah, that’s what I’m worried about. 

You are way overdue.

Hi, Jon!

 .

What’s this about disintegration?

.

Alien SmileOh, nothing, nothing. 

Come in, sit down.

.

What are those burn marks on the couch?

Alien SmileNothing to worry about at all. 

So, you are a male, huh? How’s that working for you?

[crinkles his brow]

It’s working pretty good.

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Quite a conversationalist, aren’t you?

Let’s just get down to it. Who are you and what do you want?

That’s a tough one.

Who are any of us really? Part of me wants to know why you’re blue, but, you can’t just ASK someone that now can you? Very frowned upon.

PKO_Alien 1 0003414Yes.

Yes it would be.

.

.

Did she just get bigger?

Jennifer13Yes. 

Quick! 

Answer the question!

Umm…the simple answer is that I’m Jon and most of the time I’m a writer. Some of the time, I’m a haberdasher (that’s a complete lie) and all of the time I want people to enjoy the characters I’m slapping on paper.

Alien Huh CloseA haberdasher?

What’s a haberdasher?

.

A haberdasher is a mythical creature upon which Gods rode into battle…

or a person who sells small bits and bobs used in sewing. A button salesman in effect.

Alien sourSo which are you,

The creature, the God,

or the seamstress?

.

Jennifer13Don’t be rude!

.

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387I’m not being rude. 

He just said he likes to sew.

Jennifer13That doesn’t …. Ugh! Never mind.

Can you please talk about his book?

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Erghh!. 

Okay Mr. Button Salesman:  Why do you think your book is good enough?

It’s the story you’ve been wanting but never thought the genre was capable of giving it to you. A main character who isn’t bemoaning his existence and actually has something to live for are other good reasons.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Who bemoans their existence?

I don’t bemoan anything.

.

I wasn’t saying that you…

.

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Silence Earthling!

Tell us why anyone would want to read this book Crossroads, A Demos City Novel?

If you want social commentary layered into interesting characters that make you laugh and cry and shout at them for the terribly real decisions they make, this book and series are for you. The story is the culmination of years of work, and everything fits into a tight narrative framework. Everything happens for a reason in Demos City.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387All right. It might have potential.

Tell me, does anything explode?

Yes. A lot of things.

And people.

People also explode.

Alien SmileOh!  That sounds like fun! 

Tell me more!

Michael Bay may have directed a chapter or two of this book. He wanted to remain uncredited – silent partner and all that – but there was simply too much powder used in the blasting caps for him to remain anonymous.

Alien SmileYes! 

This sounds wonderful! 

What’s it about?

This is the story of Leon Gray and his daughter Shauna. Werewolves existing in a world where their kind has been out in the open for thousands of years. But Leon is trying to raise his daughter away from the traditional pack structure.

Desperate to show Shauna he can be a good father outside a pack, Leon takes a job providing security for an investigative reporter, David Hastings who has irritated too many powerful figures in Demos.

Leon’s job? To watch Hasting’s back.

Leon’s reward? Enough money to provide Shauna with an education the werewolf could never afford on his own.

The catch? Hastings has a pair of hired killers on his trail.

Alien SmileWerewolves, huh?  Hmmm. I might give it a try, just because you explode things. So, fellow TNT lover, have you ever tried to take over the world? 

I’ve taken over thousands of worlds…through the convenience of my personal computer. Without Sid Meier, I’m not much of an overlord, but I can play one in my spare time. Does that count? I’m a very big deal on the Internet.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387So, you are a male, huh? 

Are you sure you’ve never been blue?

No, but I did paint portions of my face blue for a Walk The Moon show once. I would’ve done it twice but they discouraged it for the MTV Unplugged taping, which I also happened to be at – front row center, not bragging though.

Alien SmileWalk the moon?

So you’ve traveled in space?

I went to grad school in Boulder, Colorado, and there was this one time during the summer where my friends told me to eat this chocolate bar and not to ask any questions. I saw a lot of things that night, include space and time.

Jennifer13Ummm,

I don’t think that’s what she meant.

.

Maybe not,

but the look on her face is priceless.

Jennifer13.

While she’s lost in confusion,

how about we take a look at your rafflecopter?

Great!

I have all kinds of stuff to give away! How about an autographed ARC of the novel with annotations, autographed bookmarks and an autographed poster

Jennifer13Sounds awesome! 

Click on over to grab a chance to win Crossroads: a Demos City Novel

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Now let me get this straight… you ate a chocolate bar, and it sent you through space and time.  Is this some new food-based technology you’ve been keeping from me?

Jennifer13I’ll explain it later, sweetie, I promise.

Thanks for coming, Jon!

1 swivel

Click here to sign up for Jon’s Rafflecopter

Click below to shoot to your favorite store to pick up Crossroads

Amazon   Barnes and Noble  

1 swivel

#carinapitch Carina Press Twitter Pitch event is on NOW. Have a novel to pitch?

The Carina Press editorial team will be holding a pitch event on Twitter via the #carinapitch hashtag on Thursday, April 4, 2013 from 8am Eastern to 9pm Eastern.

Reblog from Carina Press– Angela James | March 30th, 2013

Last fall, we provided an opportunity for authors to submit their work and get both an expedited response and feedback. We had tremendous response to that submissions call, so we decided to do something that would give authors the chance to get similar feedback and response time. I’d also like to share that, from that submissions call, we found over a dozen manuscripts that we either wanted to acquire or see further revisions for, so it was very successful for both authors and us in that regard. Our ultimate goal is always to find new authors to acquire, not new authors to reject!

Last time, we heard from authors who had submissions pending that they wished they could also have the opportunity to take advantage of that, so we’ve come up with a pitch event that will allow everyone, including those who currently have submissions pending, the same chances. Please read on for details of how the event will work.

On Thursday, Carina Press freelance editors will be monitoring the #carinapitch hashtag for book pitches from authors.

The benefits:

Book pitches chosen by editors will be reviewed by the editor who requested it. Response will be given by May 31st, 2013 and those manuscripts chosen via the #carinapitch will also receive personalized feedback. Please note that we ask authors not to expect paragraphs of feedback, but specific feedback will be offered noting what the editor sees as not working or needing attention. We also would like to emphasize that the nature of this business is subjective, so the editor may provide feedback the author may not agree with. We’re offering insight into why the book doesn’t work for us (should we choose to pass on it, rather than acquiring, which is certainly a possibility!), not providing detailed instructions on how to “fix” any issues we see.

Eligibility to participate:

1) A complete, ready-to-send, manuscript that falls within the commercial fiction genres that we publish. (Please view our submissions guidelines here)

2) You must be prepared to send your manuscript within 3 days of the #carinapitch session. Any manuscripts sent after Sunday, April 7th will still be fairly reviewed by editorial staff, but won’t be eligible for the feedback/accelerated response time.

3) The manuscript you’re pitching must be new material, not previously published material, whether self-published or released via a publisher. New material only will be considered during this event.

4) The manuscript cannot be one that has previously received a pass letter from us.

5) You may pitch more than one project.

How to participate:

1) Wait until April 4th from 8am Eastern to 9pm Eastern, which is when the editors will be monitoring the hashtag.

2) Craft your compelling book pitch into one (no more than two) tweets. Indicate if it’s more than one tweet by using 1/2 and 2/2 so we can piece them together.

3) Post them to Twitter from your account using the #carinapitch hashtag (the only way we’ll know they’re for us!)

  • Please do not post pitches for one book more than twice during the #carinapitch event. Even if you’re changing your pitch, please pitch the same book no more than twice during the day.

4) Watch for a reply from a Carina Press editor.

5) If an editor lets you know that they’d like to see your submission and your manuscript is NOT currently on submission with us:

  • a) please follow the submission guidelines here and include all required information. Send your submission to the submissions email, not the editor directly.
  • b) Make your subject line: #carinapitch Title by Author (genre)
  • c) Address your query letter to the editor who requested your manuscript
  • d) At the top of your query letter, please include the Twitter pitch you used and your Twitter name (to help the editor recognize your request & verify that they asked for it)
  • If more than one editor asks for your submission, you may choose which editor to send to, though you may also wish to indicate the second editor who had interest, in case the first editor chooses not to read it.
  • e) Send your submission no later than Sunday April 7, 2013

6) If an editor lets you know they’d like to see your submission and your manuscript is already in our queue.

  • a) Send an email to submissions@carinapress.com
  • b) Subject line: #carinapitch Existing Submission
  • c) In the body of the email, please include the Twitter pitch you used and your Twitter name (to help the editor recognize your request & verify that they asked for it).
  • d) In body of email, please tell us the date you originally submitted your work, the title of the work, the genre and the name you submitted under. It’s helpful if your email comes from the same email address you used to submit the work.
  • If more than one editor asks for your submission, you may choose which editor to send to, though you may also wish to indicate the second editor who had interest, in case the first editor chooses not to read it.
  • e) Email us no later than Sunday April 7, 2013

Notes about #carinapitch

  • You don’t need to direct your tweet to a specific editor. We’ll all be monitoring the hashtag throughout the day. However, if you want to bring it to the attention of an editor you think it’s particularly suited for, you are welcome to do so. At the bottom of this post is a list of participating Carina Press editors and their Twitter IDs.
  • Please don’t post your pitch more than twice during the day. We know you want to make sure we see it, so we don’t mind if you post it at two different times, but please don’t post one book more than that. This includes not changing your pitch five times and posting it five different ways, please. Two pitches per book, so the hashtag doesn’t become cluttered and allows all authors equal opportunity to be seen. Thank you!
  • An updated list of what different editors are looking for will be posted here on the blog Monday. You can see editor bios here.
  • Information about what we publish, our submissions guidelines and specific FAQs can be found here.

Feedback is welcome! Please email us at generalinquiries@carinapress.com if ever you have specific, constructive feedback you’d like to share.

One last (very important) note:

Even if your pitch isn’t selected by an editor, that doesn’t mean your project isn’t right for us. In the end, it’s the words you write in the story that will get us to acquire the book, not the words you wrote for the pitch, so if you’ve written something we publish, please still submit it to us. Your chances of having the manuscript acquired are just as good as those whose pitches we single out!

*Permission to forward this post, use it on blogs and author forums is permitted.*

Participating editors:

Angela James @angelajames

Tina Burns @TinaBurns

Deb Nemeth @DebNemeth

Jeff Seymour @realjeffseymour

Elizabeth Bass @ElizabethBass

Melissa Johnson @MelissJohnson

Gina Bernal @GinaBernal

Alissa Davis @AlissaDenay

Mallory Braus @MalloryBraus

Meredith Giordan @MeredithGiordan

Megan Records @MeganRecords

Author Katie Salidas teaches the Little Blue Lady from Mars to Cook, and #free ebooks for everybody!

Free_Fridays!

Yay!  It’s Freebee Fridays time!

First of all, Congrats to last week’s winner: Mary Preston

You’ve received a free copy of “Crisis of Identity” by Denise Moncrief.

If you’d like to find out more about Denise Moncrief and her books, click on over to  http://www.denisemoncrief.blogspot.com/

.

Alien Zig Zag

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Jennifer’s not here this week, so I don’t have to worry about her being all squishy with these authors.  Finally I get to do an interview without her complaining!  Let’s see who’s here [opens the door]

Hi!

I’m Katie Salidas.

I’m here for the cooking show.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Cooking show?

.

Yep.

Where’s your kitchen?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Umm, It’s Jennifer Eaton’s kitchen actually,

and it’s over there.

Okay.

I’ll just make myself at home.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387What’s with the bowls and pans?

Why’d you just turn on the oven?

Well, we’re going to cook,

aren’t we?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Cook? What’s going on? 

Who are you anyway?

Who am I? Oh no one really, just a small wallflower of a writer who pens the most realistic and gritty urban fantasy vampires. I don’t do sparkles, and I don’t do vegetarian vampires. What I do “do” is emotion, struggle, pain, and ultimately overcoming the obstacles. I also do cookies.

Alien Huh CloseCookies?

Wait a minute.

Actually, we need to wait about five more minutes for the oven to preheat, but there’s lots to do while we’re waiting.  But you know that, right? You’re a cooking show host.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387The last thing I actually cooked was a novel that I didn’t like. 

I blew it up.

Oh!  I love symbolic imagery.

I blew up an idea yesterday.  Storyboarded it and everything.

Alien Huh CloseUmm

What?

Okay, First we have to combine the sugar, flour, baking soda and salt into a bowl.  Can you start whisking that for me?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Ahhh, I guess.

This thing looks just like a miniature ray gun.

Be careful there.  You don’t want to spill it.

Funny, you act like you’ve never whisked baking ingredients before.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Call it my tragic flaw

.

That’s okay.  In my book Immortalis Carpe Noctem, my My Main character is flawed, that’s for sure, but who among us isn’t? She’s real, she young, and has a lot to learn. And as the series progresses you’ll learn right along with her.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Can she show me how to bake?

.

No silly. That’s what I’m here for.

Now let’s get those sugars mixed up.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387With the whisky thingy?

.

Nope.  Use your hands.

Get out all the lumps.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Wait!

What’s that?

Err, a hand mixer.

We need to start beating the ingredients.

Alien Huh CloseWhat did the ingredients do?

What would you beat them?

I like you you’re funny.

Let’s get the rest of these ingredients in here

Alien Huh CloseAre you sure you know what you’re doing?

This looks like a lump of Martian calowog dung.

I sure do know what I’m doing!  I also know how to write books.  Immortalis Carpe Noctem has sold over 10,000 copies.

It’s almost as good as making cookies!

PKO_Alien 3 0003387I’m not so sure you are good at making cookies. 

How can I be sure your book is any good?

I’ve got positive reviews on every site from Goodreads to Nook! I know this book is good and I want more readers to find it as well!

Alien Huh CloseReally?  But isn’t this book about vampires?

It’s so overdone.  It seems like everyone is becoming a vampire these days.

Becoming a vampire is easy. Living with the condition…that’s the hard part.

Now we need to form this into a roll.  Can you do that?

Alien SmileLike this?

.

Perfect!

Now we need to refrigerate it for forty-five minutes.

Alien SmileWhile we wait,

tell me more about your book.

Newbie vampire Alyssa never asked for this life, but now it’s all she has. Rescued from death by Lysander, the aloof and sexy leader of the Peregrinus vampire clan, she’s barely cut her teeth before she becomes a target.

Kallisto, an ancient and vindictive vampire queen – and Lysander’s old mate – wants nothing less than final death for her former lover and his new toy. She’s not above letting the Acta Sanctorum, and its greatest vampire hunter, Santino, know exactly where the clan can be found.

With no time to mourn her old life, Alyssa’s survival depends on her new family. She will have to stand alongside Lysander and fight against two enemies who will stop at nothing to destroy them.

Alien SmileWow! 

That actually sounds pretty cool!

It is very cool.  And so is our dough.

Now we need to cut this into cookies four inches thick

Alien SmileLike this?

And spread them on the pan, right?

Yes. Hey, you don’t run a cooking show for nothing, you are a natural at this.

Now we bake 12 to 14 minutes.

Alien SmileSo tell me. 

When you’re not baking, do you ever explode things?

In real life, sadly, no. But I have a friend who does that kind of thing for a living. He is an inspiration behind one of the characters in my Immortalis series and he’s also my weapons consultant (so my writing is always accurate where that is concerned.)

Alien SmileOh! 

Has he ever taken over the world?

You know, taking over the world sounds all well and good, but then there is the responsibility of actually “ruling” the world. That sounds too much like work to me. LoL.

Alien SmileNo.  No work. 

I’d just let Jennifer M. Eaton take care of all the hard stuff.

Speaking of hard stuff, we’ve made quite a mess.

Do you have a clean-up crew?

Alien SmileYep. The annoying whiney chick with the curly hair who owns this place. 

She’ll clean it up.

Great!

Let’s get these off the pan and onto a cooling rack.

Alien SmileOops.  I squished one.

Sorry

That’s okay.  There’s plenty more.

Now what we’re going to do is goob a little frosting between these cookies.

Alien SmileOh!

They look like spaceships!

They do, don’t they?

You can even put a little blue food coloring in the frosting so it will match your hair.

Alien SmileMmmmmm!

These are delicious!

If you like these, you should try my book.

It’s even better!

Alien SmileYes!  We must all read Katie Salidas’s book!

Free Books for everybody!

Click here to pick up your copy for free!

Yay!

I hope everyone enjoys Immortalis Carpe Noctem… and here’s a link to the recipe for the best chocolate sandwich cookies ever. Lemme tell ya… Amazing!  http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/cinnamon-spiced-hot-chocolate-cookies-recipe/index.html

If you want to find out more about Katie and her books, click on over to her site. http://www.katiesalidas.com/

Alien Zig Zag

Ummmm…

What the heck happened to my kitchen?

JenniFer_EatonF

The Little Blue Lady From Mars © Jennifer M. Eaton.

It’s Free Friday! #free An autographed print copy of Crisis of Identity by Denise Moncrief

Free_Fridays!

Yay!  It’s Freebee Fridays time!

First of all, Congrats to last week’s winner: J.K.Ford

You’ve received a free copy of “Torn” by Keri Neal.

If you’d like to find out more about Kerri Neal check out her blog kerineal.com/author or check her out on Twitter twitter.com/@authorkerineal or Facebook facebook.com/authorkerineal

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Alien Zig Zag

PKO_Alien 3 0003387I’m tired.

.

Why are you tired?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387I stayed up late last night watching a movie.

.

Well at least you were having fun.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387It was not fun!  It was horrible. 

Such a sad story! What a Tragedy!

What was it about?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387This mother trying to save her baby from a serial killer.

  It was horrible!

What was it called?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Alien.

.

[Presses her lips together] I’m… not going to go there.  So, are you ready for the interview?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Yes. Maybe it will cheer me up.

Let the stupid author in.

Oh, this isn’t going to go well…

PKO_Alien 3 0003387So, who are you

and what do you want?

Hi.

I’m Denise Moncrief and I’m just a writer who wants to sell a few books.

Is that too much to ask?

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Piff!  We’ll see.

Why do you think your book is good enough?

Because…because… sheesh, because I wrote it.

That’s why.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Vain little sucker isn’t she? 

Okay Miss Hoity Toity…

Why would anyone want to read it?

Why wouldn’t they?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Because you’re a hoity toity pink clad…

.

Hey!  Be nice! 

You don’t know anything about her!

PKO_Alien 3 0003387She reminds me of Sigourney Weaver.  That brown hair… those beady eyes… I don’t like Sigourney Weaver anymore.  She’s mean to poor alien mothers just trying to protect their babies.

But this isn’t Sigourney Weaver.

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387I don’t care!

.

Please give her a chance.

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387All right. 

Tell me what your stupid book is about.

I’m so glad you asked! Tess Copeland is an operator. Her motto? Necessity is the mother of a good a con. When Hurricane Irving slams into the Texas Gulf coast, Tess seizes the opportunity to escape her past by hijacking a dead woman’s life, but Shelby Coleman’s was the wrong identity to steal. And the cop that trails her? He’s a U.S. Marshall with the Fugitive Task Force for the northern district of Illinois. Tess left Chicago because the criminal justice system gave her no choice. Now she’s on the run from ghosts of misdeeds past—both hers and Shelby’s.

Enter Trevor Smith, a pseudo-cowboy from Houston, Texas, with good looks, a quick tongue, and testosterone poisoning. Will Tess succumb to his questionable charms and become his damsel in distress? She doesn’t have to faint at his feet—she’s capable of handling just about anything. But will she choose to let Trevor be the man? When Tess kidnaps her niece, her life changes. She must make some hard decisions. Does she trust the lawman that promises her redemption, or does she trust the cowboy that promises her nothing but himself?

Alien Huh CloseIs that supposed to sound even remotely interesting to me?  I just got back from Texas, and it was nothing like that.  It was far more interesting. Stupid book.

Stupid Alien.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Who are you calling stupid?

.

You, Stupid.  And Sigourney Weaver rules.

That was another stupid alien who deserved everything it got!

PKO_Alien 3 0003387What?  How dare you!

[Fumbles through drawer]  Hey!  Who took my ray gun!

Oops. 

That would be me.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Where is it?

.

Would you believe it’s out getting cleaned? 

It was a little dirty from the last book you disintegrated with it.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Well, I need to disintegrate another stupid book

– and the stupid author too!

How about you just get rid of he book by giving it away?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Never!

.

But maybe there’s a reason she’s stupid…

I mean… ergh… Umm… 

PKO_Alien 3 0003387You mean maybe she was hit by a stupid ray?

.

Stupid ray? Is there such thing?

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Yes.

.

Well, then, yes,

maybe she was hit by a stupid ray.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Hey Moncrief…

Were you hit with a stupid ray or something?

No, I don’t think so. But then, the memory erasing serum faded most of the 1990s for me.

You know what? 

If they hit her with a stupid ray, maybe she was being bad?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Oh! 

Did you try to take over the world?

I can’t talk about that. National security and everything, you understand. (That’s part of the reason they gave me the memory erasing serum.) There are things I remember, and things I’d rather forget.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387So there is a possibility you are a comrade of world domination, but you just don’t remember! Are you sure you are from this planet?  Have you ever had the odd sensation of floating in a black void with sparkling stars?

Don’t you think these questions are getting a little…personal?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Hmmm. 

I’m not sure what to do with this one.

On the off chance she’s stupid for a reason, how about we give away a copy of her book?

PKO_Alien 3 0003387That’s a stupid reason

to give away a book.

Stupid reason for a stupid person?

.

PKO_Alien 3 0003387Oh, okay.

We’ll give away the stupid book.

Yessssssssssssssss!

Hey, Denise… I don’t really think you’re stupid

.

I know :-)

.

There you have it!  Comment below, and try to make poor Denise feel better after all that.

If you’d like to find out more about Denise Moncrief and her books, click on over to  http://www.denisemoncrief.blogspot.com/
JenniFer_EatonF

The Little Blue Lady From Mars © Jennifer M. Eaton.

Are you in the Central Jersey Area? Author’ Panel Saturday

‘I’VE FINISHED MY FIRST DRAFT, NOW WHAT?’
Local authors share tips and information on getting published in today’s market (organized by the New Jersey Authors Network: http://www.njauthorsnetwork.com).

So you’ve finished the writing your book/story, or have you?

What (if any) revision work needs doing?


Where can you go for feedback?

How will you know when it’s ready to send out, and where should you try first?

Join New Jersey Authors, Jon Gibbs (moderator); Kristin Battestella; Karen Bostrom; Jennifer Eaton; Jim ‘JJ’ Lair, and Nicole Zoltack, for a fun, informative discussion on getting published in today’s market, and find out why typing ‘THE END’ is really just the beginning.

See you there for a great discussion!

JenniFer_Eaton Sparkle__F

My First Speaking Appearance as an author!

Yeah, I’m quaking in my boots.

I’m also excited and hope to have a great time.  If anyone is in the Southern New Jersey area, I’d love it if you stopped by to say hi!

(I’ll take great vibes, too from those of you too far to travel) :-)

Saturday, February 16th, 1:00

Millville Public Library

“Love in the Afternoon”

Wrapping up my Thirty Day Blog Tour. Whew!

Wow. You are not going to believe this. I find I am having trouble from believing this… but today is the LAST DAY of the Make Believe and For the Love of Christmas Blog Tour.

Wow._I_mean_really_Wow._00000

Thirty days of insane romping through the internet stratosphere. Dang.

Please hop on over to Ravena Guron’s site, where I will be wrapping up my tour with my youngest host, a teenager and super-talented aspiring novelist from the lovely land of the UK. See you there!

Enjoy!

ChristmasFiligree

Make BelieveFor The Love Of Christmas CoverWhy all the hullabaloo? Well, it’s to promote my two new releases “Make Believe” and “For the Love of Christmas”

That’s why!

And don’t forget to click on “Enter to Win” for a chance to win your choice of the two titles! Yay!

Oh, I almost forgot… A few random commentors along the tour path will win their choice of anthologies, too. So be sure to hop on over and say “Hi”

ChristmasFiligree

Hop on over and send me some love!

Ravena Guron’s site

ChristmasFiligree

Visit my Anthology buddies! They are celebrating too!

Jenny Keller Ford

J.A. Belfield

Kelly Said

Lynda R. Young

Terri Rochenski

Janelle Lee

Dani-Lyn Alexander

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Related Articles

http://ravenaguron.blogspot.com/2012/12/shiny-new-ideas.html