Last week I opened up with some really personal information, and I was encouraged by the outpouring of well-wishes, and emboldened by the number of you who contacted me both publicly and privately about your own personal battles.
Click here to see last week’s post. This is where we are.
My son’s most common phrase: “I hate you.”
It doesn’t even hurt anymore. I’ve managed to turn off my emotions. I wish the rest of the family could. It’s so hard, and my handling things without emotion just leads to fights between me and my husband, which escalate and draw in the rest of the family in one way or another. Like I said last week, this is as close to Hell as I ever want to come.
We need to *****
Sorry, I had to mediate the screaming session going on upstairs. (again) and I completely lost my thoughts.
Anyway… We’ve now listened to lesson one “Why is my kid like this?”
Our frustration level with the program is pretty high right now. We want help, but the first disk is really informational. I’m trying to be as positive as I can. I’m trying to keep my husband from throwing it against the wall.
Thinking it over, and remembering a comment from someone last week, the first disk seems a lot like a first professional session with parents. It is all about assuring the parents that this is not our fault, which was a big concern. Did we slip on the last one? Was he exposed to too much from his older siblings? Are we too easy on him? Too hard on him? Why is our parenting working on the older kids and not him?
This is my situation. I have a 9 year old and a 12 year old who are both off the charts smart. They come home, throttle through their homework, and anything less than an “A” on a report card is a surprise (That we discuss in a manner of “how can we help with this” rather than being judgmental… we want school to be fun.)
Then we have our youngest, who acts out in school, has seen a counselor for anger, and his recent report card rated him at mid-kindergarten level across the board, and he is in the middle of first grade. I quietly contacted the teacher and asked if he was going to be left back. This is when our lines of communication opened with her and his reading teacher. I told them what we were doing, and they were excited and asked how they could help. Hey, I’ll take all the help I can get.
I’m going to cut this post here and continue it on Wednesday, because on finishing it I realized it was way too long. I’ll start up right where I left off on Wednesday.
- Dealing with a child with behavioral issues: Our family’s journey with The Total Transformation program (paulaacton.com)
- Expect Nothing-And Get It (bikecolleenbrown.wordpress.com)
- Let Go of Behavior Management; Teach it Instead (parentingfromscratch.wordpress.com)
- What is your child really saying when he says he can’t? (lmatlow.blogspot.com)