A mixed week – Dealing with a child with behavioral issues: Total Transformation #14

I took a scary step this week, but one that I wasn’t afraid of doing at all.  I cancelled my Parental Help Line.  This was my life-line to a specialist for one-on-one help when I didn’t know what to do.  I really didn’t need them anymore.

I told them “I have a new kid”, and I do.

I hope that I am not jinxing myself, but I can’t really justify the expense anymore.  I honestly only needed it for the first few weeks.  Once the program started kicking in, things started to change so fast that I rarely needed help.

Yesterday my husband called me at work frustrated because Littlest Dude would not listen to direction with his homework.  He said he finally just told him what to do and walked away.  When I got home, Littlest Dude had at least finished his homework, but he forgot a few periods at the ends of his sentences. Not too shabby.  We then sat together while he read a book to me, and we started studying for his Friday tests (Starting to study of Monday worked last week, so that’s our new norm).

Overall, he seemed fine for me.  (We’ll have to work on him being good for Daddy too)

Then Littlest Dude helped me make dinner.  I coated the chicken with egg, and he held the bag and then shook the breadcrumbs on the chicken.  Once it was in the oven, he asked if I wanted to work out… so he, 12-year-old Dude and I had a workout before dinner.  It was a really nice night. I will admit that he did push for an extra story at bedtime, and I caved.  I love that he’s being good, but I need to realize that he’s now using “good” to manipulate me into a later bedtime again.  I need to stick to the schedule so I have time for myself after I tuck him in.

Now that my nights are better, I need to try to help the days with my husband to be better.  Hubbs acknowledges that work is extremely stressful, and he’s not always in the greatest frame of mind to deal with Littlest Dude.  I can understand that – but part of the training is controlling YOURSELF in a bad situation, because kids with behavioral challenges take their triggers from you.

I have to admit that this is REALLY HARD – especially when you are faced with “outside” challenges that are out of your control.

Just something more to work on.

JenniFer_Eaton Sparkle__F

9 responses to “A mixed week – Dealing with a child with behavioral issues: Total Transformation #14

  1. Overall, it sounds like you’ve had an excellent week, and rewarding good behavior with an extra story at bedtime doesn’t sound too bad, as long as it’s only one more. If it becomes too much like he’s manipulating you, you could tell him he can have two stories, but only if he gets ready for bed a few minutes early, that way it doesn’t eat into your time. 🙂

  2. I’ve only just picked up your blog but I love the humour that you use when talking about the challenges you face. I guess from the tags that you have a child with ADHD or similar? and I can honestly say that I can relate to that totally, I have a child with severe autism, no speech and learning disabilties. It’s not what you planned or what you hope for but once you’ve come to terms with that being just the way it is, I’ve found that the best approach is to tackle it with humour and accept it for what it is. Good luck with your boys and family – and I am completely there with you! Great blog. 🙂

  3. It’s so wonderful to read about your forward momentum. Good for you, my friend. Keep going. Be strong.

  4. At the onset of your process, I was thinking of the benefits that would arise to your child, but it looks like there are positive behavioral techniques a parent can learn to use on themselves, too. A good outcome for everyone. I could use some of those techniques to improve my own patience at times. 😉

  5. So glad to hear things have turned around. Hope it stays that way for a long time to come.

  6. Congrats on the amazing progress! Your kids are lucky to have someone so dedicated!