No No NO! I Will NOT let this happen! – Dealing with a child with behavioral issues: Total Transformation #15

Big scare this week at bedtime as Middle Dude came and told me he was afraid again.  Apparently Littlest Dude threatened him (And I don’t even want to repeat what he said)

And it was over something really dumb.  An accident, and really really minor.

The training whirled around in my head until confusion took over.  I did manage to sit down and talk to Littlest Dude, but I really should have scrambled for my “8 Step” card, because I’m sure I screwed it up.

Ugh.

And the weird thing is, the next day everything was sugar and spice again.  I don’t expect perfection, but after living for a few months without fear, I didn’t like having that in my house again.

A few days later, there have been no more incidents, but Littlest and Middle Dude are fighting a lot.  Littlest is not flying off the handle like he used to, and I am sure to praise him all the time when he’s good, but when he forgets to step back and think over his new bag of tricks… oh, it is just not pleasant.

I have to remember that he is not “fixed”.  The ADHD is still there, and always will be.  I just have to keep coaching him until proper behavior is a “habit”.

We’re almost there, and I will fight tooth and nail to keep going down the right path.

JenniFer_Eaton Sparkle__F

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17 responses to “No No NO! I Will NOT let this happen! – Dealing with a child with behavioral issues: Total Transformation #15

  1. Hang in there, Jennifer! You’re not alone, and it’s okay to not have all the answers all the time. Just do the best you can each day. (((hugs)))

  2. It really is 24/7 work, isn’t it? Sorry to hear your family had a setback, but good for you for picking yourselves back up and moving on.

  3. After so many successes, it must be frustrating to have the behaviors re-emerge. Unfortunately, this is an ongoing process and, like you said, it will take time for the proper behavior to become a ‘habit’. Here’s hoping you’ll have far more success than set-backs. 🙂

  4. Yes, Jennifer, sometimes love is all you have to hold onto. I have a friend whose son had / has ADHD. She had to keep bailing him out moneywise off and on because he didn’t pay attention to bills or where money had to go, or keep a job for long. My point is, he finally went to Chefs’ school and is now a happy 30-something young man, a loving son and living a life of challenge he is handling.

    There were no programs to help him when he was young, yet with love and support, he is happy now as a fantastic chef. He has found his passion.

    The bottom line is, your little man is on a program early. His future looks rosy. Life isn’t flat for any of us. There are always ups and downs. You’re doing a fantastic job.

  5. We all have times when we fall into unacceptable or inappropriate behavior. So we shouldn’t expect your son to “get it right” every time. Even with these backward steps, the overall progress looks to be forward. It must be hard sometimes, but keep strong. You are doing well!

  6. Keep the faith … and go for long walks when necessary!

  7. ‘Appreciate your enthusiasm / passion … and engagement with the here-and-now … I’ve gone up and down the spectrum on this idea of a kiddo’s “stuff” (such as ADHD) … On one hand, yeah, it will always be there … On the other hand, No … it will not always be there. But both “hands” are unexplainable. Doesn’t matter… when love is happening. Thanks for this post.

  8. Remember the positive steps he’s taken and the fact that as with children and as with adults. Sometimes it’s two steps forward and one step back.. then we figure it out and go on.. that’s exactly what little dude is doing and exactly what you are doing. Figuring it out! You’re getting there!