Tag Archives: idiot

I am Such a Stinking Idiot. I Swear!

I’ve submitted two works in hopes of publication.  Last Winter Red was accepted, and will be published in December.  Yay!  But what was the other one?

The first writing I ever submitted was early this year.  It was a 2,000 word short-story for a magazine.

This magazine is very well-respected, and takes submissions until the end of January.  They choose the best out of the submissions to publish at different times during the year.

Their requirements were very clear.  It needed to be about a dog, the dog could not talk, and it had to be polished and ready for publication.

Hello, let me introduce myself.

I am an idiot

Well, heck, I had a story about a dog!  I ran it through some betas, worked it until I wanted to spit, and submitted it.

I never heard back from them.  Not a squeak.  And I can’t even say they didn’t get it, because I have a tracking number.  They got it.

I guess it’s okay that they didn’t respond.  They said they would only notify those who were chosen.

Anyway… I stewed over it for a while.  Why wasn’t mine good enough?

I read the magazine, and my story beginning might not have been a fit for their readers, but the ending sure was.  A story is a journey, right?  I just figured my beginning may have been the problem, and moved on.

A few months ago, my writers group announced that they would be publishing an anthology, and asked all members to consider submitting.  I thought about this 2,000 word story.  The chances that I would send it out to any other magazine were slim.

Soo….. I opened up my final submitted version, and gave it a read for the first time in four months.

My eyes widened after reading the second line.  No!  It can’t be!  I scanned back to the beginning, and started over.

Yes.  It can be.  Right there …  In the second stinking line.

A TYPO.

How the heck many times did I proofread this?  How many betas did I go through?  How much time expended?

A Typo.  Not just a typo.  A BIG BLARING TYPO!  So much for “Polished and ready for publication”.

Hello, let me introduce myself.  I am an idiot.  They probably never even read past the second line.

Yep, it’s me.  I am an idiot. Feel free to smack me. Ugh!

Hello. Let me introduce myself. I’m an Idiot.

Hello.  Let me introduce myself.

I am an Idiot.

The other day, as some of you noticed, I posted my Monday night February 13th Blog post “Lesson 27” in the normal time-frame.

Nothing new.  I try to be punctual.

This time, though, I tried to jump the gun and get it out before dinner.  (I’d prepared it the day before)

As I pressed the magic “publish” button, my computer hiccupped, I lost internet, and I also lost my post.  “Oh no!  That took me hours!”  It was gone.  Just gone.  It wasn’t even in my drafts anymore.  “Ugh!”

I grumbled, and sat down to dinner.  After doing the dishes, I opened up my Blog, praying it would be there.  Nope.  Still gone.  My dog sat there sadly, knowing it was her grooming time.  “Sorry Chloe, Mommy needs to figure this out.”

I opened my dashboard trying to find the draft.  It had to be there, right?  Nope.  Gone.  Chloe whined.  I patted her on the head.

When I glance back at the screen, I saw that two people had commented on the missing post.  “Commented on what?”  Could they see it?  I couldn’t see it.

After meddling with the system for a while, I finally found my post….  Back on January 28th.

Did I pull a Michael J. Fox?  Did I time travel?

No, but my computer did somehow.  Now I have no Blog post for Monday, and an extra one in the past, and a two-day-old post on my home page.  How the HECK-OLA does something like that happen?

Chloe barked, and I let her out.  Sorry, Chloe.

So, what the heck do I do?  Rather than having people jump to my Home page and not find a post, I copied Lesson Seven from its odd place in the “past”, and re-posted the same article in the “present”.  Now, I didn’t delete the time-travel post, because there were already comments on it, so there are two strings of comments on two different dates about exactly the same topic.

Whew!  Anyway… sorry about that double post.  And Sorry Chloe, for not getting to brush you.

I finished that post last weekend.  Added the art, made it pretty.  And then I left it in my “drafts” folder.  I’ve done this countless times before without any problems.  (When you have three kids, you need to write whenever you get a chance… and life doesn’t always agree with your blog schedule).

Anyway… while I was fiddling— copying the content of the time-travel post to re-publish it— I clicked on a button by mistake.  A date popped up… and my magic “publish” button changed to “Schedule”.

I am such an idiot.

I never knew that was there.  I could schedule my posts weeks in advance if I wanted to, and not have to stress about getting them done on time!  How many times had my posts popped up on Tuesday because I didn’t get a chance to hit that magic publish button until 11:00 PM, which is already the next day in WordPress time.  (Making my incredibly anal brain feel late.)

Let me repeat

Schedule your stinking posts, Jen.

Just in case I am not the only IDIOT in the world… there is a little schedule button over on the right when you compose your post.  Duh.

From now on, if my posts hit your email at 1:00 in the morning, it’s not because I have insomnia.  I’m just giving you a whole day of “reading joy” rather than waiting for me to get home from work, make dinner, clean up dinner, brush the dog, and tuck the kids in before I get a change to press that stupid publish button.

A schedule button

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