Category Archives: Senseless Ranting

Help! I need a 17 to 19 year-old guy to beta read about five pages. Know anyone?

I need a little help. In a recent critique session a male critiquer told me something was impossible.

I would really like to get the opinions of a few guys in this age range who are not squeamish and will not have trouble talking about a sensitive subject about sexuality.

I’m not going to ask anyone intimate details about their life… I’m just asking them to read a few pages from a novel and say “Yep, could totally happen” or “No, you are crazy lady… there’s no way.”

So, if you are a teen guy, or remember your teen years very clearly, or you know someone who’d be willing to read and give an opinion, please respond below.

I appreciate the help.

JenniFer_EatonF

It’s my website’s second anniversary! Yay!

It’s my website’s second anniversary!

Yay1!

Wow.  Two years already.  Where has the time gone?  Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask for anything crazy like you guys writing a story with me, because a bunch of you are still doing that! (If anyone wants to join up, we’ve always happy to see new writers. Click here to join.)

Anyway… For this anniversary I’m setting a challenge for MYSELF instead.  I feel really behind now, because I took nearly two months to write a query and synopsis for Fire in the Woods.

Did you hear that??? TWO MONTHS.  I still want to smack myself in the head.

**That’s crazy**

It’s two months of trying to control my creative juices, and keeping down the new story idea that crept into my head. (I admit I did take two days to outline the idea so it would stop screaming at me to be written.)

Today, I am sitting down for the first time in months and digging back in to the work in progress that I had put on hiatus.  Optimal Red is a Dystopian novel for the New Adult market.  It is a Prequel to “Last Winter Red”, my first-ever published story in the “Make Believe” Anthology from last year.

Yep. I’m excited too.

I’m starting today with 14,000 already written words, and giving myself a challenge to finish the first draft by mid to late September.  It’s going to be tight, because Paper Wishes releases in three weeks (and yes, I am doing a full blog tour to support my baby – Cover should be ready soon!)

I still have final sign-offs to do on The First Day of the New Tomorrow (Which will release in September)  and a blog tour for that baby as well.  Yep, Mommy’s going to be busy.

But nothing will keep me from writing this time.  It’s what we do, right?  Although I’m incredibly anal and have plotted out how many words I need to write, and on which days… I look forward to getting back into my world, and my writing routine.  I missed it.

Who else out there needs a little kick in the butt to finish????

Race ya to the finish line!

Ready.  Set.  Go!

Happy writing!

_JenniFer____EatoN

Aren’t stats just the coolest thing? People really do stop here. It blows me away.

I just love Statistics.  Well, I love statistics that can be handed to me on a silver platter.  I leave the figuring out the statistics and other “mathy” things to Middle Dude.  His mom is mathematically challenged.

Anyway, A year ago I started counting unique visitors to my site.  I know a lot of you are here a few times a week or more (Thanks!) but I was wondering how many NEW people come.

The statistics actually blew me away.

I started calculating in mid June, 2012, and a year later, here are my stats.

free counters

This counter says that in the past year, over 12,000 UNIQUE people from the USA have stopped by my site.  That’s INDIVIDUAL people, not repeats.  How stinking cool is that?

In second place are my buddies in Canada, over 2,000 strong.  Hello up north!

And a big howdy over the pond to the 1,700+ people visiting in the UK.

All in all, people from 151 countries have visited this site.  Part of me knows that some may land here by accident, but when they hop around to find out about me, I can’t help but grin.

When you really look into your stats, and what people clicked on to bring them here, and what they looked at once they landed — well, the internet is a pretty amazing thing.  How the heck can I have a conversation with someone in Saudi Arabia?  (I’m going to bed, she’s having her morning coffee) Weird, isn’t it?

It’s incredible to me how technology can make the world such a smaller place, isn’t it?

I don’t recommend getting too obsessed with your stats, though.  I was for a while, giving myself an aneurism every time the stats dropped a bit.  They can drive you crazy, and I’d much rather spend my time writing.

What do you think? Do you love your stats or hate them?

Click to Tweet:

Do you love your stats or hate them? Looking into your numbers can drive you crazy 

Aren’t blog statistics the coolest thing? 

How many individual people visit your website? It’s great fun finding out!

JenniFer_EatonF

If you are thinking of entering a contest – READ THE FINE PRINT

I was going to keep my big alligator mouth shut, but I can’t.  I just can’t.

A call for submissions was recently announced that is an incredible opportunity…  A contest to write a prequel to one of the classic children’s movies from the 1980’s. How cool would that be. Right?

A group of friends and I gathered our kids, and we watched the movie.  We brainstormed, and we were excited.

Afterwards, I breezed over to the web-site and looked up the history of the time period that they provided as a basis for the world-building… and ideas started to flow.

Then I checked the fine print

As I looked over the terms and conditions, a few things popped out at me as HUGE red flags.  I thought, “Hmm, this is a major publishing house, and a big American iconic company.  There’s no way that I can be reading this right.”

So, I did the smart thing, and contacted a lawyer.

I’m so glad I did.  What they told me, horrified my socks off.  Really, it did.  Those suckers flew right across the room.

In a nutshell, whether you win or lose… if you enter the contest they have the right to use your story, and your name to sell it at any time.  Even years later… once you’ve hit it big.  They have a story by you that they own… and there’s not a dern thing you can do about it.

Here’s the worst part — We writers enter these things all the time.  We figure that if we don’t win, we can change the names and the world and sell it as something else, right?

Nope.  You can’t. NEVER. They own your story for eternity.

I’m going to give you the direct quote sent to me. If you re-write the story and publish it with different names and change the world…

“Are you sitting down? – they can sue you for using your own story that they now (and forever) own, and they would 100% win in court.”

That’s insane. And I’m ashamed.  I’m ashamed because I LOVE the brand behind this contest and everything having to do with them.  I grew up with them and I was uber-excited to have a chance at being part of it.

Not anymore.

In respect of the brand that I love so much, I will not tell you who it is.  If you don’t know, then you are not in danger, but if this sounds familiar, and you are considering it, PLEASE take a look at the terms and conditions.

Do I still think this is an incredible opportunity?  Yes, I do.  But you need to weigh the risks against your chances.

If I spend six months creating a masterpiece, and it is not chosen, I deserve the right to revise and use my story elsewhere.  In my mind there is no such thing as a story “Dependant on” the original.  Anything can be revised.

If you are going for it, good luck.  I wish you the best.

Sadly, I will not be any competition.

JenniFer_EatonF

When to say “Enough is enough” – Coming to the end of your query rope

As many of you know, I have been in what I’ve called “Query Hell” for over a month now.   One month and eleven days, to be exact.

It hit me a few days ago.  I finished the first draft of Fire in the Woods in 40 writing days. It was 40,000 words at the time. (After three months of editing and beta reading, it is nearly 68,000 words)

That means that it took me the same amount of time to write 40,000 words as it took me to write this 249-word query (mainly, the 155-word blurb inside it)

How crazy is that?

A few days ago, I said. “Enough”.

This is my problem — I know I am not good at queries, so I had requested a lot of help.  Seriously – I think people were cringing. (With smiles on their faces, I hoped)

But the problem was… I was getting SO MUCH feedback, with contradicting opinions, that I was getting NOWHERE.

A few weeks ago, I complained about this process on Facebook, and an acquisitions editor at a small publishing house commented “Just write the back cover copy of the book.  That’s all we want to see”

Well, yeah, I know that.  That’s what I was trying to write… but people kept saying I needed more.  A little more voice here, a little more danger there.  It was getting TOO LONG.

A few days ago I sat down, cleared my head… thought about all the suggestions people have made… and I just wrote the dern thing.

Funny, the best parts of all their suggestions just flew out of my fingers… and I sat there and stared at it.

Wow.

I mean, I think Wow… but I’d thought Wow before… so I (being the glutton for punishment that I am) send it to three people (leaving out the person who always found flaws)

I got two enthusiastic thumbs up, and a slight modification.

I made the modification (which fixed something I was uncomfortable with anyway) and asked for one last check – including the most critical person this time. (Who I love by the way-if you are reading this)

Triple thumbs up.  And all around “I’d ask for this in a heartbeat”

**Whew**

You can’t believe the sigh of relief.  Part of me feels like I have wasted a month and a half.  I could be nearly done my new novel, but part of me realizes I have made an important first step to getting where I want to go.

The truth is, Fire in the Woods is too important to me to be flippant with the query.  I’m going to be reaching higher than I have before.  I need to take my bumps and bruises just like anyone else.

So… if you are writing your query, or your synopsis… and feeling the pain… I sympathize.  But believe that you can get to the finish line.  Believe me, if I can write a decent query, anyone can.

There is a book out there that’s better than yours

I’ve been told time and again that there are thousands of books out there looking for representation that are as good as or better than yours. It’s just one of those “slap in the face” things that you are told when you start out in writing to make sure you understand that there is fierce (but friendly) competition in the query-market.

Up until today, I had read quite a few beta novels that were as good as my work, or would soon be just as good.  I throw out my pom poms and wish them all the best as they begin to submit.  I do.  Really, I do.  I am THRILLED when I hear that someone lands an agent or gets something published.  I think it’s awesome!

Today, I finished a beta that shattered me utterly and completely.  I just read a novel that will be querying the same time as mine.  It will be in the New Adult category, where mine will be in the Young Adult category, but that is still TOO CLOSE for my comfort.

Is the story like mine?  No.  Not at all, but it is Speculative Fiction.  So, what scares me?

Scare is not really the right word.  I have the sinking feeling that I have just read the next Hunger Games, or the New Adult equivalent to Harry Potter. I have never been so on the edge of my seat.  I have never been so absorbed thinking about a novel and dying to get back to it. I have never been so invested in characters that were not my own.

Swirls of emotion go thorough you when you are touched by something so deeply.  You begin to question yourself. Is your novel anywhere near this good?

You push aside all the accolades you’ve received.  You forget that people have told you how much they like your book.  All you can do is envision THAT OTHER BOOK sitting on an agent’s desk, right beside your own.

It’s humbling.  Very Very Humbling.

I contacted the author to let them know how I felt about their story, and to make sure they shoot for the stars, because this is where that book belongs.

I could feel the gushing coming through on her response.  And she should gush… all the way to a six figure advance.

How am I? Well, after downing a vat of Chocolate Almond Fudge ice cream, I slapped myself upside the head.

Her novel is NOTHING like mine.  There is even a possibility that someone might pass hers over and reach for mine because they have not seen a good high-paced alien explosion novel lately.

The publishing industry is so odd and unpredictable that you can’t know what will happen.

If she emails me in a month and tells me she landed an agent and a big six contract all in the space of a week, I will not be angry.  I won’t be surprised either.  I will do a happy dance of joy for her, because she will deserve it.

And then I will send out another query as I toast her success.

Yes, there will always be another novel out there that is better than yours.  But somewhere in the world there is an agent or publisher who will pick up yours and say “Holy cow! THIS is what I’ve been looking for FOREVER!!!”

Someday.

For now, I think I might need to get another half-gallon of ice cream.

_JenniFer____EatoN

Rekindling your relationship with things you used to love

My oldest son recently has been asking questions about art.  He wants to learn to draw.  Hubby said “Ask your Mom.  She’s a great artist.”  So, I sat with him a few times and gave him pointers… not really expecting him to take anything seriously. (He jumps from thing to thing a lot these days.)

This weekend he asked if I would take him to the store to get some supplies.  Nothing fancy, just some pencils, a real drawing pad, and colored pencils.

He was a little overwhelmed with all the choices, but we decided on a few basic supplies, and I told him I’d see if I had any colored pencils in my old art supplies. He was really interested in learning to draw in the Manga style, so I picked him up an instructional book.

As we sifted through my supplies at home, I came across my old sketch books, and my paintings.

Dude’s eyes opened in awe.  “Wow, you drew these?  Why did you stop?”

Why did you stop?

Well, the truth was, I hadn’t picked up a pencil or a paintbrush since a few weeks before he was born (and he’s 12) I told him, “After I had kids I just had different priorities.”

He said to me, “But we’re all older now.  You should start drawing again.”

So, I figured, why not?

I sat down with a sketch pad, opened up the book on how to draw Manga, and just followed the directions.

To be honest, after not drawing for 12 years I was a little skeptical what I’d be able to do, but I was pretty happy with what popped out of my pencil within 15 minutes or so.

Manga photo 1

I have to admit, it felt really good having a pencil in my hand again.  Yeah, I made a few mistakes and had to erase a little, but I was dern pleased that it didn’t totally stink after being out of practice for so long.

My son asked if I’d take a night a week to draw with him.  I figure, why not?  I need to work on my Manga hair, anyway. Maybe the next one won’t have split ends.  🙂

How do I always end up in messes like this?

Okay, I know half of you want to just spit on me, and I have no right to be tense, stressed, or frustrated.  My problems are good problems to have … but how the heck did this just happen to me a SECOND time?

If you’ve been hanging out here for a while, you’ll remember that “Make Believe” and “For the Love of Christmas” released a day apart last year, and I had to do all of the editing simultaneously with two different publishers.

Well, this time around, I hoped I’d get a break.  But it was not meant to be.

The first round edits for “The First Day of the New Tomorrow” came in first (which surprised me) So, as I am readying to sit down with them… in come the edits for “Paper Wishes”.

Yes, this is the chance we take when we sign with two different publishers about a month apart.

“Okay,” I thought.  “No problem.”  Paper Wishes was already published, right?  All I needed to do initially is take out the words Astraea considered curses, which I did, so I should be good to go, right?

Ummm… no.

Yikes!

I have a little work to do to bring it more in line with what they want for a Christian novel.  Some things I expected (like taming down the make-out scene) but a few of the other things surprised me.  I’m going to need to think these changes over to keep the realistic tone of the story, but keep it within their strict, but understandable parameters.

In other words, YES, I have some work cut out for me.

The First Day of the New Tomorrow edits were topped with a nice note from the editor “Thank you for such a clean manuscript.”

Yay1!

But, as always, there are a few things in there that made me cringe.

One was a reference to “Ken Doll” which the editor changed to something else that made me think of blow up dolls.  Nope, can’t do that.  I quickly hopped over to Mattel’s web site and asked for formal permission to use “Ken Doll” (Which was a decent amount of paper work, but not impossible if you ever find that need.) Now I just have to wait for their approval.

So, yeah, busy week ahead of me here.  I’m a little stressed, but it’s a happy kind of stress.

It’s all good.

JenniFer_EatonF

For Memorial Day, Remember. Read this post and remember to thank someone for all they’ve done for us.

This is a story that touched my heart. One everyone should read.  I can’t tell you how much this touched me.  It sounds like another silly dog story, until you hit that hook in the end.  If this does not make you cry, and want to support those fighting to keep our freedom, then I don’t know what will.

I don’t know if this is real or fiction, but either way it packs a punch

Reblogged from Jenny Keller Ford’s post from Sept 7, 2012

***

This is a great story…worth reading.

They told me the big black Lab’s name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I’d only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.

But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn’t hurt. Give me someone to talk to. And I had just seen Reggie’s advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn’t look like “Lab people,” whatever that meant. They must’ve thought I did.

But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner.

See, Reggie and I didn’t really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (which is how long the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too.  Maybe we were too much alike.

I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that. “Okay, Reggie,” I said out loud, “let’s see if your previous owner has any advice.” ____________ _________ _________ _________

To Whomever Gets My Dog:

Well, I can’t say that I’m happy you’re reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie’s new owner. I’m not even happy writing it. He knew something was different.

So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you.

First, he loves tennis balls. The more the merrier. Sometimes I think he’s part squirrel, the way he hoards them. He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn’t done it yet. Doesn’t matter where you throw them, he’ll bound after them, so be careful. Don’t do it by any roads.

Next, commands. Reggie knows the obvious ones —”sit,” “stay,” “come,” “heel.”

He knows hand signals, too: He knows “ball” and “food” and “bone” and “treat” like nobody’s business.

Feeding schedule: twice a day, regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand.

He’s up on his shots. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car. I don’t know how he knows when it’s time to go to the vet, but he knows.

Finally, give him some time. It’s only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He’s gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides if you can. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn’t bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, and me most especially.

And that’s why I need to share one more bit of info with you…His name’s not Reggie. He’s a smart dog, he’ll get used to it and will respond to it, of that I have no doubt. But I just couldn’t bear to give them his real name. But if someone is reading this … well it means that his new owner should know his real name. His real name is “Tank.” Because, that is what I drive.

I told the shelter that they couldn’t make “Reggie” available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. You see, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one I could’ve left Tank with .. and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call to the shelter … in the “event” … to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my CO is a dog-guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he’d do it personally. And if you’re reading this, then he made good on his word.

Tank has been my family for the last six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family. And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family, too, and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way he loved me.

If I have to give up Tank to keep those terrible people from coming to the US I am glad to have done so. He is my example of service and of love. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades.

All right, that’s enough. I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter. Maybe I’ll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth.

Good luck with Tank. Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight – every night – from me.

Thank you,

Paul Mallory

____________ _________ _________ _______

I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure, I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the Silver Star when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer.

I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the dog.

“Hey, Tank,” I said quietly.

The dog’s head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright.

“C’mere boy.”

He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn’t heard in months. “Tank,” I whispered.

His tail swished.

I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried my face into his scruff and hugged him.

“It’s me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me.” Tank reached up and licked my cheek.

“So whatdaya say we play some ball?” His ears perked again.

“Yeah? Ball? You like that? Ball?”

Tank tore from my hands and disappeared into the next room. And when he came back, he had three tennis balls in his mouth.

***

http://jennykellerford.wordpress.com/2012/09/07/wet-nose/

Another big announcement! Can I hear a WAHOO!?

I am thrilled to announce that I have signed with Muse It Up Publishing for “The First Day of the New Tomorrow”.

This will be my first (published) Young Adult piece, which tickles me to death because I just LOVE writing younger characters.  It’s so much easier to develop a story around characters who don’t have to worry about annoying “adult” things.  Ya know what I mean?

The First Day of the New Tomorrow is an “unexpected super-hero” story with an intense (and -of course- explosive) finale.

Here’s the blurb:

First Day of New

Maya dreams of perfect skin, beautiful hair, good grades, and Eric Brighton—the boy she’s been crushing on since middle school.

No matter how hard she tries, all these things elude her. New Topmorrow 3But when a creepy college recruiter arrives with news that Maya has omnipotent powers, things change quickly.

Having everything she wants is a lot harder than Maya expects, though.

Will she give it all up for the chance to be normal again, even if it means losing Eric?

0026_CracksAndCrevasses

Release date and cover reveals to follow.

Yay1!

JenniFer_EatonF